37. Pinky Weds Faisal
Even before I had left for England for Hena’s wedding, Pinky’s marriage
had got fixed and in fact a small engagement function had also been done. The
boy named Faisal was a computer engineer in America and his parents belonged to
Allahabad. I was told he had come and met Neyaz earlier in America. They were
just one brother and a sister and she was already married. Niamat was by that
time posted in Bombay. Pinky’s studies were completed so Shahnaz came with her
and stayed in a guest house where the engagement was held.
From Gorakhpur only Ajju had come and from our side Reyaz was there as I
had some health problem at that time. Reyaz was all praise for the boy when he
returned . Shahnaz had sent the pictures of the occasion. Pinky had completed a
3 year course from a good institute, in designing, which is much in demand in
America. Shahnaz had accumulated all kinds of jahez items right from her Male
days and only some jewellries were to be purchased. A date in the month of
November was fixed for the wedding. For once Niamat requested the bank to get
him transferred somewhere close and he was posted to Lucknow and shifted there
with the family.
Just a fortnight before the wedding, Shahnaz called and told me that Pinky
has got fever which has refused to subside and the doctors are suspecting
typhoid. Shahnaz sounded distressed as she had no household help. The memories
of Pinky’s childhood days are still vivid in my mind. When Niamat used to go on
tour, Shahnaz used to come over to my place after sending her to school and
receive here there only from the school bus. As she got down the bus and had
lunch with us, she will not let Shahnaz stay in peace and wanted to go home
immediately saying she had to complete her homework.
Whenever she had the slightest fever, she would call me to be there
immediately. I used to take rasgullah worth 5 rupees and after having them
Pinki would ask me to prepare a dish of bread that was called “papa”. Only then
the fever would come down. She was born with inordinately fair complexion.
I started calling her Pinky as some of the other girls by this name
I knew were very beautiful. She was later named as Shahla Niamat but even to
this date she is still called Pinky by all her relatives.
I got concerned hearing about Pinky’s illness. I spent a hundred Rupees to
send a guy to get Bano from her village. Bano was earlier our household help
and was very sincere and organized type. I left for Lucknow together with Bano
and one more girl Ladli. Reyaz too was very fond of Pinky and he also went with
us. I reached there a fortnight before the wedding with the clothes etc. that
were prepared for the wedding. We started from Patna by train early in the
morning and by 9 o’clock at night we reached Lucknow. Niamat had gone somewhere
on tour and Pinky was not well so Shahnaz could not come to receive us and
instead had sent the driver with a placard in the name of Reyaz.
Niamat’s official residence was quite spacious and had a guard at the
gate. Pinky looked much better and was cheerful now. I told her that I have
brought rasgullah for her which should cure her completely. From next day
morning, Bano and Ladli, took complete charge of the kitchen and managed
everything there very efficiently.
When Niamat returned from the tour, Reyaz wanted to go back. Fiasal was
not inclined to wear sherwani for the occasion but Shahnaz was very keen. She
gave an almond colored material to Reyaz to get a sherwani stitched at Patna,
of his own measurement. Reyaz was not in favor of that if Faisal has given his
preference, why should she insist otherwise. Shahnaz, however felt that once it
gets stitched Faisal will wear it.
Pinky had recovered but was still weak as aftermath of typhoid fever. She
used to take plenty of milk and regular oil massage. A couple of days prior to
the wedding, the guests started coming in. The weather was ideal as it was
neither too cold or warm after the Durga Puja. Nearly everyone from both the
families came over. Niamat’s father was then alive and graced the occasion.
Other than all my children, Rukhsana and Immu came with their families so did
Sufi and Manjhli Dulhan (her mother) from Aligarh. There was no representative
from Rajendra Nagar even though Hassoo was very much eager to come but
eventually could not gather enough courage to undertake the journey. Nawab and
his wife has come from Sabzi Bagh. Mona had come with her mummy as well as
Haliman Bua. Niamat’s brother Pervez was then posted a SP in Purnea and he came
with a couple of police constables who knew cooking as well. Sohail had come
with Sharique and Khalid who had a fractured hand that was plastered. Mahfooz
who had come close to them during the construction of the house in Kankerbagh,
had also come. Mahfooz had joined a job in Delhi in which Niamat had
helped. All these people were made to stay in a guest house just
opposite the house. MashaAllah, the gathering was so
enormous, every day the meals were served equivalent to that of a mini baraat.
A couple of days prior to the wedding, the Manjha function was held.
Everyone gave clothes for Pinky as well as for Shahnaz, Niamat and Amaan. Even
Ladli and Bano were given nice clothes. The dinner on the Manjha night was
arranged for even more numbers as quests too were invited. One constable
remained busy making bread for the entire day, while the other one was cleaning
the utensils. Shahnaz’s planning and arrangement was excellent. She used to
fill up a large thermo-flask with tea since morning and could be had as and
when anyone wanted. Ejaz used to get mutton and vegetables from the market.
For the baraat day, the arrangement of the main dinner was delegated to
Jawaid, who was also residing in Lucknow at that point of time. Later we found
that every item in the dinner was extremely well made. Only the roti was not
our liking as we are so much used to the baqarkhani. The wedding arrangement
was done in a house which had a huge compound.
In the baraat, some 15 men and half a dozen ladies had come, who were all
arranged to stay in some hotel. The nikah was held with Reyaz and Ajju were
made the two witness. The qazi had come at the recommendation of
Shamsul Huda (Niamat’s brother in law). After the nikah was ever, he started a
khutba that was stretched for such a long time was just not coming coming to an
end. Every aspect of life as well as end was elaborated by him much to the
impatience of the listeners. Before the Nikah, Faisal had put on the sherwani
made for him, at the request of Reyaz but was replaced by the western style
suit once the nikah was over. I had taken pagri, sehra, turra
baddhi everything from Patna, and all that he was wearing when I
went to see him for the first time. He was looking grand in that attire.
This was followed by long session of congratulations and greetings. I went
and met the samdhan who appeared pretty young herself. For the wedding geet,
Haliman was the sole initiator latter joined by Rukhsana and her younger sister
Immu (Imrana). A cousin of the samdhan who had come got up and started dancing
and singing. It was such a hilarious scene that everyone gathered around and
now it was sort of a competition for both the sides and was very enjoyable.
In a suitcase, the clothes for “bari” had come which was all nice. With
the kind of ornaments worn by Nuzhat, Shahnaz and Mehar, of olden times, I
overheard someone remarked that it seems they are from a Nawab
family. By the time the dinner of the gent’s section was over, Pinky
was dressed up assisted by Shahda and Mehar. Earlier in the evening, at home,
when I was having my Maghrib Namaaz, I suddenly heard a female voice calling
me. I was dazed, how Azra could have suddenly come all the way from America.
After the Namaaz when I turned my head, I found that Ruby, Azra’s daughter was
sitting there and she had come with her husband Saleem. They lived in Allahabad
and were invited by Shahnaz.
After the dinner of the male segment was over, the ladies were called for.
The arrangements were good and so was the food, and the dinner was served
properly on the dining table with chairs. I am never pleased
with buffet dinners we often see these days. In our religion, eating
food in standing position is not encouraged.
After the guests left, it was a mixed gathering and all the baratees and
us were under the same shamyana. Pinky was taken to the stage and made to sit
next to the groom. None of the conventional rituals were performed except that
Shahnaz offered a glass of sharbat to the groom. After the function was over,
for the first time I saw that the groom left with his relatives back to the hotel
where he was living and the bride came back to her own home, Faisal’s mummy had
specified that in their family the union was done at the boy’s own house.
When we all came back home, Pinky took off all the ornaments to be kept
safely and changed her dress to the same old nightie that she used to wear
earlier, and moved around the house in the same casual manner. Somehow I did
not find it too pleasing as he entire house was full of relatives.
For the rukhsati next morning, shamyana has been erected in the garden and
halwais had been called for preparing the breakfast. Hot kachoris with pastry,
sandwiches, fruits and boiled egg, added with other dry eatables made earlier,
was a big success and everyone piled on to it. As they were to leave for
Allahabad by car, Pinky was dressed in a light banarsi shalwar and kurta
and a single light ornament. The groom in shirt and pant also came
and sat next to her in the middle of the hall, I gave the salami to him in the
form of a ring, a fish made of silver, and paan box all arranged on a tray.
Shahnaz formally introduced me to him and he offered his salaam to me. Other
relatives were also introduced thereafter.
The time of rokhsati finally arrived and they all sat down in the car Rice
was showered on the car, which was moved back and forth three times before
taking off.
The next day most of the guests left and only the close relatives remained
there. Reyaz, however had to leave with Sheeraz for getting him admitted to
Bijapur Medical College. By chance, Amaan also had to appear in some
competitive exam related to his admission in America, and had to leave. In the
evening Pervez got a number of seats booked in a cinema hall for the movie “Ham
aapke hain kaun”. Everyone who had remained, went to see the movie
except Nuzhat, Shahnaz and myself. We had to leave for Allahabad the next day
morning. Ejaz got the sweets and basket of fruits from the market.
I took out my clothes meant for the Walima. As my own suitcase was rather
huge, I gave it probably to Shahnaz or Mehar to carry, but that was eventually
not taken along. In Allahabad too the stay arrangement was done by Niamat in a
guest house. After the tea and freshening up when we started getting dressed
up, I found that my clothes for the occasion had not come. Each one of them
said it was not given to her. I couldn’t do much about it now. Whereas sari was
not difficult to get, blouse became a problem due to fitting. At last Nuzhat
gave me a pair from her stock. The blouse somehow was managed but was white and
had a somewhat wide neck by my own standards. I covered it with my sari.
Eventually we all reached Pinky’s sasural. There were two identical houses
of the same color and were well decorated and lighted. A large ground was there
in between where the dining tables were arranged. At the other end of the
field, sofas and chairs were arranged for the seating arrangement for the
guests. Pinky, instead of being seated there amidst the guests, was sitting in
a room inside on a carpeted floor covered with plain sheets. She was sitting
just like other local guests there; neither dressed up properly nor the
ornaments. When we reached there to meet her she looked lost. Someone from
their side remarked that they have married such a young girl and that’s why she
is feeling so uneasy.
We were asked to sit on the sofa arranged in the ground outside. Pinky too
was subsequently brought there. We were served with the cold drink. Ruby and
her husband Saleem stayed there for some time and then left after inviting us
for the breakfast next morning at their place. Pinky and her husband were also
invited. All this time Faisal himself remained busy with the arrangements.
After we all had our dinner there, we went back to the guest house.
At 8 o’clock in the morning, I got up and got ready to get Pinky from her
sasural. All of us reached Ruby’s house. There we met her mother in law and
whole lot of the joint family members. The mother in law was really beautiful
and nice natured as well. We kept chatting for some time. We were then taken to
a semi closed huge verandah where the dining table was laid. It was sort of a
brunch. Ruby later told me that they have one such meal at around 11 in the
morning together and the other meal is again had in the evening when they
return from the office. I was pleasantly surprised to find Bihari Kabab on the
table and was told that Ruby has done it with her own hands. Ruby had a
separate flat of her own within the same compound and used to be there with her
in laws during the day. Her kids had gone to school so I could not see
them. Then Ruby took me to her portion of the house and connected
the phone for me to talk to Azra who was so pleased to hear that we all were
there with Ruby. Azra told me that Saleem always used to tease his wife that
why no one from your side had ever come to meet you here.
When we all returned to Lucknow, Pinky also came with us. Faisal however,
said that he will come after a couple of days as he had to settle so many
things and his father was alone there. Nuzhat, Shabaana and Pervez left for
Purnea. Mona went back to Patna. I stayed back as I was told that Pinky is
shortly to leave for America with her husband. After staying with us for two
days both of them went to Delhi for the visa and got it. They went back to
Allahabad to meet the parents and finally both of them left for America.
A week after that Amaan also got the intimation of his admission in an
engineering course in America. As Shahnaz and Niamat were to go to Delhi to see
off Amaan, I thought I will not be able to stay there alone in that big house
so I decided to come back to Patna but reservation from Lucknow was not
available. I went to Gorakhpur from there with a constable Pervez had managed.
Together with Bano and Ladli, we stayed at Gorakhpur for a day from where a
direct train was there for Hajipur. When we arrived at Hajipur I saw both Mona
and Reyaz were waiting for us there.
By this time summer had set and the temperatures soared. Shahnaz used to
take a shower at night and used to sleep very close to the AC. Joint pain recurred
again to her which was of the same type which she had got at the time of Ejaz’s
wedding. It was later aggravated by high fever and the illness became very
severe. Niamat called Reyaz and asked him to come. When I heard of the illness
I also went to Lucknow with Reyaz taking Ladli along. Morning and evening a
numerous doctors were coming to see her but ailment could not be diagnosed. The
pain was so severe that 4 strong pain killers were given to her every day. I
couldn’t do much service except to offer her my prayers and at the most took
out fruit juice for her. In this situation of distress, I realized the
sincerity of Niamat. He was genuinely concerned all the time and used to feed
her the juice and give medicines with his own hands and kept consulting all the
reputed doctors of Lucknow one after another.
One of the Bank’s orderly who used to come there was very sympathetic. He
would always feel sorry that the memsahib was so active earlier and now she had
got bed ridden. He also narrated that the previous house lady had faced similar
ailment earlier. “When she had come here, she was perfectly alright”. He said.
She had some kind of “havan in the house and thereafter fell ill very severely
with the same type of joint pain. When Niamat was told about this story, he
contacted his predecessor and checked with him who confirmed that the
information was correct.
Shamsul Hoda who is brother in law of Niamat and himself is a doctor,
suggested them to go to a Maulana but Shahnaz was not willing to go despite insistence
from Niamat and others. Eventually after much persuasion she was taken there as
he lived in a narrow lane there. He listened about the symptoms and examined a
few things and diagnosed that it is all due to some evil spirit. He recited a
few prayers and gave her some water for drinking and sprinkling all over the
house. Some prayers were inscribed on paper and given to be hanged inside the
house. As per the version of Shahnaz herself, on their way back, she was
feeling much lighter as against the onward journey. The medication also
continued as before and with the kindness of Allah she gradually started
recovering. Niamat got hell bent on shifting to another house. As the other one
was not so nice, Shahnaz was not inclined to shift.
In the meantime, I brought her to Patna to stay with me for some time. But
Niamat had become extremely biased against that house and eventually he got
himself transferred from that place to to Delhi. As the time of shifting came
closer, Shahnaz had to go back. The entire packing was done by the professional
packers and Shahnaz just used to give them directions.
Much after they had left Luckhnow, we came to hear that the story of the
house was so widely circulated that thereafter no one was willing to shift his
family there an eventually the Bank had to convert it into a Guest House.
MashAllah both Shahnaz and Niamat have been healthy since then.
I had planned that I will close this book at this stage when Pinky came with her young son and has been insisting that I must write about the next generation as well. Both these grand-daughters of mine are as close my heart as my own daughters. Even though Pinki is not able to read Urdu, she said she will have it translated in English for her convenience. I can make out she has said that just to appease me. Still:-
“Dil ke bahlane ko Ghalib yeh khyal achha hai”
Pinky is now in a very good job in America. Even as she has now become a
mother of a boy herself, she is herself very much like a child as she talks.
Hena also has lots of affection for me. Whenever she comes from England, she
always stays with me before leaving for Purnea. MashAllah now she has two
pretty girls Zara and Zoya who are going to be as brilliant as their nani. May
God grant them all a happy and long life. I also pray to Allah for both Pinky
and Hena they be able to get most suitable son in laws for their daughters, in
the same fortunate manner as their Nanna had.
Now all my travelogues are over. I had this wish to pen down the experiences
that have been the highlights of my life. This wish of mine has also now been
fulfilled. Thrice I had the privilege of performing the Haj, may Allah accept
them. I have visited other parts of Saudi Arabia on two different occasions.
Also went to Pakistan twice in addition to England and America. Now only the
last journey is left for me for which I pray to Allah that He makes it easy for
me. Thus all of it will be over. Those who are reading this book are requested
to pray for me. That will be far more than the compensation that I can ask for.
Khuda Hafiz
20th March, 2000.
Hamida Bano
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Chapter
INDEX.------------------------------------
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